I didn't write last night. I just wasn't in a good place. I lost a cousin yesterday in a very awful tragic way! He was the same age as me and I just cannot fathom why he did this?? My heart breaks for his parents! They are truly wonderful people and must be just suffering right now. I heard the news shortly after getting to work yesterday and it really bummed me out.
As for the diet, it was one of those days where I just wanted to stop it! I had that day, yes even in week 4, where I tried to convince myself that being fat wasn't so bad! Just look at all the good food I could then eat. I went to BJ's after work and was picking some things up and had my hand on a case of coke?? I was honestly trying to justify just having one each day! Thankfully I walked away! Then there was rice krispie treats, oh how I love them! Again, I had to battle with myself but I did walk away! I can normally just go in a store and get what I need to get and not be so tempted, but yesterday was not that day! I don't know why I am struggling so, but even this morning I wanted to stop at Dunkin Donuts! I was trying to calculate how many points a blueberry muffin would be.. i finally realized it would be too many! I pray that I can get my mind strong again.. this weakness is going to bring me doom and destruction! and it doesn't help that I need to go food shopping, I am out of bananas and my yogurt.. that left me with not many choices for my snacking today...
Again, I ask if you are reading this, keep me in your prayers!
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